By this I mean that a persons autism is always there regardless of whether it’s visible or not. At certain times it will be more apparent than others but it does not mean they are suddenly more autistic. Just like when they are dealing well with the world. There Autism isn’t smaller just more of it is covered up than usual.
Just like the moon has its phases that can be predicted down to a fine science I have my moods. I regularly swing between uncommunicative to being the life of the party and back again. Yet what is acceptable for the moon to do is not allowable for myself. I have to be at new moon stage all the time which isn’t possible. Right now I’m in the waxing phase rather than a waning phase but since these are cycles I will come out again on top if only for a brief period.
Just like you can’t change the regularity of the moon it would seem that you can’t change me unless something equal to a meteorite hits me. I’ve had a couple of life changing events already but it’s tough to bounce back from each one. My orbit has been increasingly limited in decreasing concentric circles so in order to prevent myself from crashing and burning, I need a boost to re establish a good orbit. I’ve been having difficulty escaping the gravity as it increases the closer you get to the planet. I can do it but the power required increases as time goes by as you have further to go.
Finding that power source is like looking for diamonds in the earth. Eventually only the koh – I – noor is big enough to rescue you.